By Joeel A. Rivera
For the second time in two weeks I was on my way to the hospital, at 3:00 a.m., trying to manage the uncontrollable shaking, the feeling of my skin burning, the extremely high blood pressure, the chest pain, and the severe disorientation (among other things). I asked myself,
“How did the best time of my life, which I shared with my wife, turn into this hell a month after our return from the trip?”
It all started with our passion for nature, exploration, and adventure. We decided to spend our honeymoon exploring Costa Rica. We stayed by the beach, by a volcano, and in the jungle of Tortuguero, where the nearest road with vehicles was an hour away by boat. We swam in waterfalls and encountered species of wildlife and plants that we had never seen before, such as being awakened at night by howler monkeys and catching a glimpse of our favorite butterfly (and company mascot), the elusive blue morpho. Everything about the place—the food, the people, the environment—made us feel like we were in what we would define as our heaven.
We did not have much time for souvenir shopping, so we only brought home a couple of things. However:
We did not realize that there was an unintended souvenir already developing in my body.
Three weeks after returning home, I took my daughter to the pool, and as I tried to get in I felt my body start shivering and I could not stop. I quickly went into to the shower and stayed there until my body warmed up. This was weird to me because the pool was 90 degrees. I brushed it off and assumed that it was just a minor cold. I tend to be pretty healthy, so I was perplexed when for the rest of the week, the symptoms started to happen more and more frequently.
Then, we left for a family trip and drove 1,000 miles to Washington, D.C. to take my daughter to see the Smithsonian Museums. On the first night of our trip, I realized that something was really wrong. I woke up in the middle of the night soaked in sweat, burning, shivering, and my blood pressure was through the roof. By instinct, I quickly jumped in the shower (which I later found out brings blood pressure down). After about 20 to 30 minutes it subsided and I went back to sleep but, to my shock, I was up in another hour experiencing the same thing. It continued like clockwork every hour after falling asleep. A friend that lives I the area got me an appointment with the doctor she works for, and I was tested for everything imaginable. All of my tests came back negative.
For the two months that followed, this was my experience at least five out of seven nights in a week. During the day I was weak and disorientated; at most, I would have a couple of hours that were manageable. The next two days I was still too weak to live a normal life—and then the cycle would repeat. At times my blood pressure would be so high that I had to go to the emergency room out of fear of having a heart attack. Time and time again they would do a number of tests on me, and every single time everything would come back saying I’m healthy as a horse. What a blessing that my body appeared to be normal and healthy—yet I couldn’t escape the terrifying feeling that there was something terribly wrong and no one could help me. What was this thing that was deteriorating my body? What was causing my beard to turn gray, black circles to form around my eyes, rapid hair loss, and severe weight loss when I am vibrant, healthy, and only 34 years old?
After many trials, unanswered questions, prayers, research, and doctors visits—and in spite of the fact that I still had zero test results upon which to base a diagnosis—I was finally given treatment for a suspected parasitic infection. With proper medication and herbal treatments, I began ridding my body of my “unintended souvenirs,” and my symptoms began to improve rapidly. There was finally hope.
My journey through illness to healing may seem to have been a negative experience, but I am a firm believer that out of every challenge there comes many blessings. That is, if you are open and willing to see them.
Throughout my life, I have learned how to be present and “in the now;” however, nothing prepared me for being in that space when my body was in survival mode. Talk about being in the now.
Truly nothing else matters outside of this moment when you’re body is fighting to survive.
But being present isn’t enough; I knew I must find a way to be present through these experiences without fear. And so, I made a conscious choice that when I was feeling better I would not focus on the fear or concern that the next wave is going to come. Instead I would remain focused on the fact that I was feeling better, even if it lasted only several minutes. It may seem like an easy choice, but the brain and the body naturally want to anticipate what will happen next and how to prepare for it. But I was determined to make the most of those short periods of health, and then to remember them during the periods of illness.
With my new focus and some other tools I’ve picked up along my path, I discovered that when I woke up with high blood pressure that if I sat and meditated for 15 minutes I could bring my blood pressure down by 20 points, sometimes even normalize it. I learned how to control my body’s natural reaction of shivering with conscious breathing techniques. I reminded my mind time and time again that I could take control of my body.
I got to a place of acceptance, gratitude, and appreciation. I remember one intense night as I looked at my wife sleeping: I repeated to myself,
“Love conquers all. I am so blessed.”
As I healed my body of the parasites, I gained the true souvenir of a lifetime—my internal heaven, and the understanding that love and gratitude can be internally healing.
You don’t have to wait for such an unpleasant reminder. You can learn to truly live in the now and fully appreciate the small things in life. And in that place where you make peace with what is and stay focused on love and gratitude, you’ll discover that little piece of heaven is within you, no matter where life’s adventure takes you.
The souvenirs you keep encapsulate memories of moments past. The ones you release remind you that the current moments are always the most precious of all.
Joeel A Rivera, M.Ed., is a visionary, entrepreneur, and motivational speaker. From an early age, Joeel faced adversity, including immigrating to the United States, failing his freshman year of college, losing his brother, and being in a nearly fatal car accident. These experiences inspired him to return to college, where he earned a Master’s Degree in Education and is currently completing his dissertation for his Ph.D. in Psychology, with an emphasis on happiness. Joeel opened a non-profit teen center in honor of his brother and developed curriculums for the Juvenile Justice System. In almost a decade, Joeel has reached over ten thousand people as an educator, entrepreneur, speaker, and consultant. Visit www.joeelandnatalie.com.
This article is an SNEAK-PREVIEW from the to-be-released book Transform Your Life! Inspirational Stories and Expert Insights, written by 60 real-life heroes and experts and available at www.Transformation-Publishing.com, Amazon.com, BN.com, and all ebook formats.