Rock Solid: How to Find Unconditional Stability and Joy

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Aziz Achark

By Terez Hartmann

Rock Steady Whether “They” Do or Not

If only my family, sweetheart, friends, etc., would get well and stay well and happy, my life would be perfect!

If only I could have more time available to just be able to chill, my life would be perfect!

If only my coworkers, clients, boss would be nicer and do their part, my life would be perfect!

If only the lump sum, windfall, big break, promotion, big client, or investment would come through, my life would be perfect!

If only I could figure out the magic potion for my hormones to chill out, for my body to feel great, and move easily ALL the time, for my mind to chill, and for sleep to be a total breeze, my life would be perfect!

If only the people, governments, systems, and “they” of my town, city, state, country, world would get their sh!t together to create and promote a culture of peace, fairness, unity, and respect, my world—and THE world—would be perfect!

No matter how far along you are in your journey of self-actualization, chances are you just may have entertained one or more of these ideas at some point in your life. But, as you and I both know, the “inbox” of life never seems to be empty and the “they” of the world never seem get everything sorted, once and for all.  It’s no wonder your body, mind, and spirit can feel like the proverbial ping-pong ball, and that you can often find yourself “waiting” to feel good.

While I most certainly do believe we create our life experience, perception, beliefs, and personal point of attraction, I have come to know that the “they” of the world also have the nerve to continue to create their OWN experiences—and often without consulting you or me! And with that, nail-biting, stress-balling, and gnashing of teeth can be a far too common companion that messes up what is supposed to be a glorious and FUN ride around the sun.

What if instead of waiting for your “if onlys” and for “them” to figure it all out before YOU would feel any kind of peace or joy you decided to focus in a way that allowed YOU to still get to feel good NOW and EVERY day in some way, no matter what?

Ever since I set this question in motion, life, the Universe and everything has revealed more and more answers, ideas, and insights with each passing day. However, when I allowed the contrast I was experiencing in recent times to challenge me to reach for my center in even stronger, bolder ways, a gift —in the form of a new process and flow—emerged that helped to bring about a major shift that is positively impacting every facet of my life to this moment.

If you are ready to become rock solid and rock* steady, I dare you to try THIS!

*And people, “rock” in this sense is most certainly a verb, baby!

From Appreciating Conditions to Creating Unconditional Joy

Many of us maintain a practice of making lists of things we appreciate/are grateful for in our lives and often share this process with our clients to help them direct their focus in more positive ways, but even with all the good that can come of this process, we can unknowingly train ourselves and our clients to focus in more “conditional” ways.  Granted, the idea behind creating and encouraging gratitude lists is to acknowledge that there are ALWAYS positives to be found—and it’s a powerful practice that is well worth continuing, for sure—but what if all the people/relationships, toys, vacations, pets, comforts, recognition, signs, abundance, etc., that came your way were no longer the SOLE reason for your happy feelings, but rather beautiful bonuses, awesome upgrades or sensational, happy surprises that only ADDED to your solid center of serenity and day-to-day “rule” of well-being?

If you’re open and willing to give yourself a taste of what more consistent, day-to-day satisfaction and joy could look like, I’d like to challenge you to also create a different kind of list—one that celebrates the good that is timeless, unchanging yet dynamic, and that transcends conditions.

Rock Your World by Creating an “UN-condition List”

STEP 1: Do anything you can to lighten up your vibe

Do something, go somewhere, listen to music that is linked to happy feelings, watch a movie/show/YouTube video that elevates your vibe and DO IT NOW.

Once you feel a little lighter and brighter, move on to STEP 2.

A side note: If you’ve also been longing for “you time” to chill, unplug, create, etc., there is great power in deciding to carve out non-negotiable time for YOU in your day/week/month.

 I recently started giving myself the gift of #HumanNatureMonday (dedicating most of my Mondays to spending time out in nature, and typically, by myself), and have kept this promise to myself for five weeks now. In addition to the fun and anticipation of enjoying my “me-time,” even though my “to-do” list continues, this simple act of self-love started a domino effect of well-being and productivity that inspired me to find a powerful list of my own “un-conditions,” to start dreaming in technicolor again, and amp up my Firewoman Mojo in amazing ways!

 BTW, you can see photo galleries paired with ideas and insights on my Facebook page and soon I’ll even be sharing my stories and adventures on YouTube and beyond, so stay tuned!

 One more thing to add here: I know I’ve said this before, but when you wait to LIVE, you live to WAIT.  The journey really, truly, absolutely IS the destination, friends, and you deserve to start enjoying YOUR journey and LIFE right NOW.

STEP 2: Give your list a title that inspires YOU. Here are some ideas:

My UN-Condition List/Unconditional Joy List
My Eternal Flame List
My Rock Steady/Rock Solid List
My Solid & Steady List
My Truth/What I Know for Sure List
My “Anchor” List
My “Reason to Feel Good Anyway!” List

Once you have your fab, feel-good title, move on to STEP 3.

STEP 3: Make a list of your “UN-conditions:” The solid, steady things you know FOR SURE.

Change is the nature of life, and people, creatures, environments, and circumstances can and will change—however, there are things that ARE certain that no one and nothing can ever take from you—that you get to “keep” no matter what others around you may choose. These are things you KNOW in your heart that you feel are TRUE and undisputable with every ounce of your being, things that even your most critical/logical self cannot dissect.

Create this list in one or more mediums that allow you to be able to access it from anywhere and at any time. I have a copy that I can access via my phone, printed copies posted throughout my home, a digital copy on my PC, and a handwritten copy in my journal.

Below are a few items from my personal list to help get your wheels turning, but please note that your list may look quite different from mine—and that is VERY okay. All that matters is that you feel a resonance when you write something down, that it feels absolutely TRUE for YOU, and it gives you a sense of peace or even joy. It can be one thing, or 1,000. No one else EVER has to see this list. This is a gift to you, for you, from you.

My Rock Solid, Eternal Flame List

  1. Every new day is alive with possibilities: beauty, joy, love, wellness, prosperity, and likelihoods for fabulousity continue to exist somewhere and at ALL times whether I’m perceiving them in the moment or not.
  2. Source/God/My Core Self and My “Posse of Fabulousity” are always with me, loving me and guiding me toward my path of greatest allowing of my well-being.
  3. Everyone I love and every point of consciousness ALSO has Source/God/their Core Selves and THEIR personal “Posse of Fabulousity” loving them and guiding them toward their path of greatest allowing of their well-being: And if/when I can be a cooperative component for their well-being and play a constructive role in that process, I feel clear and energized.
  4. I always have some access to nature, whether I look out, up, down or inward.
  5. There is always beauty to be found/perceived any time I am open and willing to look for it.
  6. Music exists and I have a multitude of ways to enjoy and express it.
  7. I have the ability to feel, express, and receive love.
  8. I have the power to focus my mind and can use it to think better feeling thoughts, remember happy times, and contemplate the good that could be possible.
  9. I have many natural talents, gifts, and skills that I can use in a variety of constructive, productive, fun ways—and have the ability to learn NEW things.
  10. There will always be happy, aligned people and creatures who want to express love and participate in joy and fun, and I can encounter them any time I am open to perceiving and receiving them.
  11. There is always more than one path (even multiple, infinite paths!) to realizing the things/experiences/state of being I desire, which can feel like gentle motion forward, be filled with light and/or even be OUTRAGEOUSLY fun!
  12. I can always stop to ask, “How can I have more fun right now?”
  13. Any moment I feel even the slightest bit better—whether it is simply a sense of relief or feelings of calm/serenity, hope, possibility, laughter or joy—are moments of success and victory.
  14. I can always ask for help, and there will always come a time when I open myself up to be able to receive it.
  15. Source always sees the big picture and is a MASTER & EXPERT at orchestrating the IDEAL timing and circumstances.
  16. There is purpose and a gift in EVERY experience and everything IS always working out FOR me: I know my life is an ongoing journey of discovering greater clarity, more joy-filled adventures, and an even fuller expression and allowance of the love, brilliance, creativity, and joy of my SELF.
  17. There are always times that I AM ready and DO feel inspired and happy to do things.
  18. I always have some time available in each day to do things that nurture my soul, spirit, body, and mind, and know that I can upgrade my perception to know that “me” time IS always possible in some way.
  19. If I’m not enjoying my journey, I always have the ability to take even a small step in a new direction that feels better.
  20. I know at my core that I am a happy, kind, intelligent, fun, loving, beautiful, resourceful, creative being, that these aspects of me are eternal, and that they CAN be accessed by me.
  21. I have a solution-oriented mind and thought process, and that I am, at my core, a visionary who can ask, “what if?”
  22. Every time I make a solid decision about something and hold my vision, life, the Universe and everything backs me up and doors open!

STEP 4: Read YOUR list DAILY
I like to read my list just after waking, as it sets such a powerful tone for the rest of my day. Starting with a rock-solid foundation of well-being and knowing has been seriously rocking my world, and interestingly enough, I’ve been attracting more and more “bonuses, upgrades, and happy surprises” ever since I started this process! Try it, you may like it!

Keeping a copy of your list with you will also give you a powerful go-to if your vibe starts to slip a little, and reading it before bedtime can even contribute to resting with a happier, lighter heart and mind.

The Bottom Line: Rock Solid! Finding Unconditional Stability and Joy

Let’s face it.  Living a reactive, conditional life can flat out suck. Who wants to be a leaf blowing in the wind landing wherever the “powers that be” take you, when you can be a mighty oak tree or a proverbial Rock of Gibraltar standing solid and firm in your joy, no matter what weather comes your way?

Here’s to choosing to rock steady, allow REAL success through letting yourself experience satisfaction and joy EVERY day, and to truly, madly, deeply living life on FIRE!

Author’s note: Did this article and process lift your spirits and rock your world? For more tools, ideas, and insights for Allowing YOUR Joy and living life on FIRE, join Terez Firewoman and Transformation Coaching Magazine founders and master teachers, Joeel and Natalie Rivera, for a life mastery class like no other:

Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann,“Your catalyst for all things Fab-YOU-lous,” is the author of Allowing Your Success!, a proud contributing author of Transform Your Life! book one and two, a professional Keynote Speaker/Workshop Facilitator, Singer Songwriter/Recording Artist, “Allowing Adventures!” & “Savor Vacation” Facilita-
tor, and true Renaissance Woman, and Visionary. She keeps her fire lit by embracing and promoting a lifestyle of “Allowing,” and by using creative expression to elevate and ignite the human spirit, a passion that she shares with her husband, soul-mate and creative partner of over 15 years, John Victor Hartmann. Together they share “Allowing TRUE LOVE” workshops and experiences designed to help others attract, allow, and maintain extraordinary relationships, and create custom jingles and voice-overs in their studio, THE Creativity Express. Visit:

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