I was born on Mother’s Day. Baby number five and the fourth girl—another girl. Following my birth came news that I don’t believe anyone could be prepared for at such a time: My mom was not expected to make it through the night. She was given her last rites, and it was a sad and traumatic moment in my family’s history. I was going to be fine, but was my mom? Thankfully, she did pull through following medical care and needed recovery.
It was not easy to forget being a part of the moment when my mother’s life almost ended.
I don’t remember my age when I learned about this story or first looked at myself and wondered why I was born under these circumstances. I do know that it left me with unanswered questions and, as a result, I began to search for truth at a young age.
I was raised with church as a big part of our Sunday tradition. I often wondered why the world was so tough when God and Jesus are there for us. This pondering opened me up to learn about religion and start the quest to understand spirit and soul. At the time, I didn’t know anything for sure so I read and learned what I could. I wandered with my thoughts and feelings, going where the wind blew me with plenty of ups and downs. I always felt protected, but I just never knew what I should be doing.
Years later, after I was married and blessed with the gift of my two boys, something changed. I was a mom now. I experienced deep feelings of unconditional love and started to understand how love plays such an important part in our life. I felt privileged to be a mom. I wanted to do everything right and was determined to create a great life for my family. But I forgot about myself during this process.
When I finally realized I was neglecting my own needs, I went into self-discovery, and I found something big; I found the Universe. It allowed me to see God in a new way that was bigger than I could put my head around. I wanted to be part of this “greatness” all around us. I even decided to design a tattoo based on what the Universe meant to me at the time and put the tattoo on my lower back. It was my way to make the statement: “The Universe has my back!”
After I learned the Universe supports us, I felt a profound change. Perhaps my search was over? Then I realized I was still anticipating and looking for the “best day” in the future and missing what was happening in the current moment. I also wasn’t getting “where I wanted to go.” It was frustrating.
So, I continued to peel back more layers of life’s onion. I discovered I needed to make peace with myself and recognize that I was not on this earth to hurt anyone. All the judgments I had on myself and others had to be removed. I dug deep inside to find my authentic Self, knowing I had no idea who I would find or what this process would uncover. I searched inside of myself to understand why I fight for what I believe is right, and stand up for anyone who doesn’t have a voice. And, I looked at why it is so important to me to be strong, bold, and strive to be the best in all I did.
I learned that to grow I had to stop trying to understand everything and trust the Universe already has it figured out. It has my back!
It has taken me some time to honor my past and, at the same time, know that it does not define me. To make peace with the fighter inside me and appreciate all the pieces that make me who I am. I like living a life full of flavor. I know life is a work in progress, and each day connects me with another moment that is for the greater good. How grateful and thankful I am for all the experiences my life gives me each day.
I want to thank all the special souls who spend their time and talents helping others. I would not be in a place of peace today, in the now, without you. You are a gift to me and all who are ready to hear your messages.
Most importantly, this journey has taught me I can forgive myself and others. I can say I am sorry and accept I am not perfect. I think about those I now spend time with and seek out people I enjoy to be around and who care about me. I am ok with the fact that I can’t reach everyone and not everyone will like me. I can set boundaries and know it is for the greatest good. This is my life and I am grateful I get to live it.
I now realize nobody needs fixing. We are all beautiful beings walking the earth, and we learn from each other when we are ready.
As my life keeps evolving, I appreciate that the Universe has provided us with our amazing stories and so much to experience. We are all connected to its great energy. This force is everywhere, and it will take care of us. In the end, we all have the opportunity to answer the question, “Who has my back?” We do! And we just need to trust the Universe!
Kristine Ann is passionate about learning how to live life to the fullest and enjoys sharing her stories to help others. Her life experiences have given Kristine the courage to seek her authentic self, make peace a priority and trust the universe has our back. Kristine lives in beautiful Wisconsin with her husband, two boys and German Shepherd. After having a successful career with the Government Kristine decided to leave the working world and stay home to raise her boys. During that time she wrote several children’s books and hopes to share them very soon. She is currently having fun working with Children in elementary school. Feel welcome to contact Kristine Ann at KristineAnn124@gmail.com
This article is a chapter from the book Transform Your Life! written by 60 real-life heroes and experts and available at Amazon.com, BN.com, www.Transformation-Publishing.com and all ebook formats.