The Gratitude Reboot

By Ann Darwicki

It was that dreaded time of the month again… time to pay the bills. I despised it so much, that I would often put it off as long as I could. I felt like “they” were trying to get everything out of me that they could. I was a helpless victim, and I was very unhappy. My checkbook seemed to reflect these negative feelings. I never had enough money, and my bank account was frequently in the red. For many years this was the routine.

The turning point came one day when I had to buy four new tires, and I didn’t have the money that I needed to make the purchase. I did, however, have a line of credit on my credit card. I was so upset; one of my personal rules around money was that I shouldn’t have to put anything on credit. I should have the money I need to pay for our needs. My husband and I worked hard, we made good money, and we shouldn’t have to struggle like this. These thoughts obviously didn’t create a feeling of bliss and well-being!

As I mulled these beliefs over, a new thought came into my awareness. It was very different from how I usually thought—but it felt so much better. I felt a sense of gratitude for the credit card company that had, in good faith, extended money to me. Without the card, I would not have been able to buy the tires that I desperately needed to keep me and my family safe. The feeling I previous had, that “they” were out to get me—“they” were evil—was replaced with a new perspective of appreciation for the service the credit card company was providing.

But the gratitude reboot didn’t stop there. I often joke that electricity is my favorite invention, and not long after the bill paying revelation I had the opportunity to further reframe my attitude of gratitude after a weekend of camping with my Girl Scout Troop. There is nothing like returning home to air conditioning and electricity after days of living in a tent! However, indoor plumbing is a close second. Before the trip, my coleader informed me that the toilet we would be using was a latrine. I nodded and said “ok,” having no idea what she was talking about. I quickly learned, when I went to the bathroom and saw a toilet seat over top of a six-foot hole in the ground. There are few times in my life when I have felt more vulnerable.

When I came home from the trip, I recognized a sense of gratitude for the services that utilitiy companies provide. I truly enjoyed the fruits of their labors: the water brought into my home, electricity, indoor plumbing, cable, internet, my heat, etc. My life was enriched by their services.

I now pay my bills with a belief that I will gladly spend money for the services I desire in my home. I say to these companies,

“Thank you for doing what you do on my behalf every day. I appreciate it.”

It is so much more pleasant paying my bills now. I am aware that I have chosen to have these things in my life, and that I am responsible for my choices and my bills.

My checkbook is now reflecting my positive attitude around money! The flow of abundance has returned as my fear of not having enough to cover the bills has receceded. What a relief!

Ann Darwicki, RN is a Certified Professional Life Coach who completed her training at the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching. She is the owner and founder of Whole Being Coaching, specializing in coaching others to live the life of their dreams. Prior to becoming a life coach, Ann obtained as Associate’s Degree in Nursing from Delaware Technical and Community College. She has 25 years of nursing experience caring for women and children, with a lifelong affinity for holistic medicine. She is a Reiki practitioner and Nurse Luminary. She is also a freelance writer. She can be reached at 302-750-0574 or by email at adarwicki@comcast.net.

 

 

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