From Victimhood to LIVELY-hood… a Journey of BEING Well

By Terez Hartmann

Choose Your Path

Wouldn’t it be fantastic if all less-than-awesome events and experiences were always someone or something else’s fault? Wow! Imagine having absolutely no part in anything—ever—and all you ever have to do is react or blame accordingly, resolving that if it weren’t for insert responsible party or circumstances here you really could live the life you imagined! Ah, but perhaps if you suffer, endure and sacrifice just enough, the gods will smile upon you one day and your ship just might come in—if you’re one of the lucky ones. Wow! Talk about an empowered, rewarding way to live…

If you truly believe that this IS how life works and are content with living in victimhood, then—I’ll just say it plainly—everything I have to share beyond this point will only tick you off, so it really it is best for you stop reading right here.

If, however, your reaction to the above paragraph was more along the lines of “Ewwwweee!!!”, and you would far prefer the notion of increasing your “LIVELY-hood” (= joy, energy and abundance), it is quite possible that some of the ideas I’m about to share may spark a little fire within you.

When things are going swimmingly in life, don’t you just loooove the idea of creating your own reality and saying to yourself, “YES!!! I did that!!!”? Ah, but when circumstances and events happen that are NOT what you know you ordered from the catalogue of total Fab-YOU-lousity, it can become way too easy to demote yourself from life creator to victim of life, which then slows (or completely shuts down) possibilities for positive results AND creates a point of attraction that brings even more events, relationships and experiences that feel just like THAT.

Believe me, there are definitely times that it feels SO much better to blame The Universe, Donald Trump, Hilary Clinton, your mom, the weather, your boss, the system, your hormones, etc., but if you want to be in a position to be able to turn things around and allow solutions, resolutions, well-being, healthy relationships or better cash flow, or to continue to grow and expand into a life that feels more like what you DID intend, you have to be willing to say “YES! I did that!” and be the CEO of your life, for better or for worse. And if you REALLY think about it, every less-than-stellar experience and manifestation ultimately provides an opportunity to discover something new, choose differently, don a new perspective that is more productive and constructive, and/or to evolve physically, emotionally, intellectually or spiritually. In any case, whether underling employee, part-time owner or full time CEO of your life, the choice is, was and always will be yours.

How much say would you like to have in BEING well in any and ALL areas of YOUR life?

LIVELY-hood and Receptivity

As a passionate, focused women moving through life, I started to notice some not-so-awesome things happening with my body, mind and emotions. After doing some research, I discovered that every symptom seemed to point to a mega hormone imbalance. With knowing this, I did feel a momentary sense of relief, but when I started talking to other women and looking into potential “cures,” any viable remedy felt like it would put me even more out of balance logistically, financially and physically. As a result of this, I had one mother of a meltdown and was, without meaning to, starting to apply for a change of address into victimhood—Yikes!

With my current state of mind, I at least had the wisdom to know that this was NOT the time to act and make any important decisions, for my likelihood of finding great tools or being able to hear, see or feel for viable solutions or possibilities was minimal at best. I knew that in order to discover my path to greater balance and well-being, I had to first be in a state of receptivity and openness, and to BE as well as I could right now, because solutions can only be recognized and received by a heart and mind that is open and willing to receive them. So my mission was clear: Cease and desist with the victim-fest stat, and do whatever I could to get into a mode of receptivity.

First, I took a nap. Then I took a nice, hot shower. Next, I focused on a completely different subject (with a lot of help from my sweet husband), and—as simple as this may sound—I gave myself permission to breathe, literally. (Thanks to a loving, gentle reminder from fellow “Amazing Woman,” Janet Lee.)

After a couple of hours in chill mode, I received my first insight: Stop taking melatonin.* I had started using the supplement to help with some sleepless nights as of late, but with my new, clearer vision, I noticed that other symptoms had actually escalated the moment I started taking this. End result: After only one melatonin-free night, I slept better and woke up feeling a heck of a lot more like my normal light, happy, self.

I then remembered that any path that leads to wellness is WELL-lit: It feels good and falls into place easily, just like EVERY meaningful, truly helpful thing I have ever had or experienced in my life. So with this knowing, I recognized that if a thought or idea felt heavy or turned me inside out, that was certainly not the thing for me at that time—and that was also okay.

From this open, more receptive state of mind, THE question then found its way in: “What IS my path of least resistance to BEING well right NOW?” From this point, more answers and ideas started to flow to me that did and DO feel good, including drinking more water, meditating more often, getting outside earlier in the day, dancing and exercising on a more regular basis, and even beginning an exploration of yoga and Tai Chi.

By choosing to shift my focus from victimhood to LIVELY-hood by doing whatever it took to be in a place of receptivity, I began to open myself up to solutions and possibilities and move from utter misery and physical pain to feeling clear, energized and alive in less than 24 hours. Quite a nice start to my journey of consistent well BEING, indeed.

What is YOUR path of least resistance to BEING well right NOW?

*Please note that I am not discouraging anyone from taking melatonin or encouraging any particular mode of treatment. These were simply choices that happened to feel good and work well for ME.

The Bottom Line: From Victimhood to LIVELY-hood

When I took a little snapshot of my journey with this subject, it was no surprise that life would bring me an experience to help me reach for greater balance. I realized that my body was not out to get me, simply out to get my attention, encouraging me to include wonderful things that further enhance my sense of well-being and life balance which, in turn, bring greater excellence to EVERYTHING I touch. Have I found the be-all and end-all? I don’t know yet. But what I DO know is that by allowing myself to be receptive enough to discover even the smallest step along a feel-good path (that may, in turn, lead to a path, that leads to a path…) I am BEING well right now. And by keeping an open heart and mind to feel for the path that is WELL-lit, I am continuing to move into more and more extended periods of wellness.

Perhaps making the move from victimhood to LIVELY-hood is also the best move YOU can make in BEING well?

Here’s to movin’ on up!


Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann,“Your catalyst for all things Fab-YOU-lous,” is the author of Allowing Your Success!, a proud contributing author of Transform Your Life! book one and two, a professional Keynote Speaker/Workshop Facilitator, Singer-Songwriter/Recording Artist, “Allowing Adventures!” & “Savor Vacation” Facilitator, and true Renaissance Woman, and Visionary. She keeps her fire lit by embracing and promoting a lifestyle of “Allowing,” and by using creative expression to elevate and ignite the human spirit, a passion that she shares with her husband, soul-mate and creative partner of over 15 years, John Victor Hartmann.  Together they share “Allowing TRUE LOVE” workshops and experiences designed to help others attract, allow, and maintain extraordinary relationships, and create custom jingles and voice-overs in their Safety Harbor-based studio, THE Creativity Express. Visit:


This entry was posted in Inspiration. Bookmark the permalink.