by Kathy Rivera Wallace
At 5:05 a.m. on Sunday morning, October 26th, my phone rings. I am not sure if I am still dreaming or awake. As I answer it, I hear the screams and anguish of my uncle, Stephen’s father. His comments are incomprehensible until I realize what he is trying to say. A State Trooper just visited the house to tell him the news every parent fears most. His only child, Stephen, was in a car accident and died.
As I processed the information and tried to talk to my inconsolable uncle, I felt as if I could not breathe. My chest was tight and tears flooded my eyes as I realized that Stephen, whom I had just had dinner with several hours before the accident, was now gone. For the first time in my life, I experienced what people describe as time stopping. I did not know who or what or where; I just knew I needed to breath or else I would pass out. As I took a deep inhale, I told my uncle I was on the way to his house. My aunt had left two days before to visit her family in New York, and I thought he was alone.
As I replay those moments in my mind now, I don’t know how I drove that night. As I made the journey, I prayed and prayed; I kept talking with God and processing the news. “This is impossible,” my mind kept saying, “This is not happening. We just had dinner with you, Stephen!” I cried.
Synchronicity Unfolds
Then, instantly my heart chimed in. With calmness and gratitude, I started to recall the events of the past 48 hours. I thought my heart would stop beating as I began to see God’s perfect plan unfolding. How could this be?
Several weeks before, I invited several friends to Casa Tina restaurant’s Day of the Dead celebration, which is held every year in Dunedin, FL. It’s a Mexican tradition that honors the dead and celebrates life. It’s a fun event with vendors, crafts for the kids, live music, delicious foods, performers, and a parade at the end of the evening. In Mexico, the holiday is celebrated on October 31st through November 2nd. In Dunedin, the event is celebrated the week before.
The night before the Day of the Dead celebration, all my friends except Ana had something come up last minute and backed out. Odd, I thought, but did not give it much more attention. Interestingly, I also was invited to go to a Halloween party that Friday night and at the last minute I decided not to go. I just did not feel up to it. I felt sadness and I was confused by the feelings. My husband thought I was getting sick because I love Halloween, and for me not to attend a costume party was unusual. I thought, “Well, I must be tired and need some rest.”
The next day, on Friday October 25th, I thought about inviting my family to come with us to the Day of Dead event later that evening, so I decided to send out a text and invite them. My family loves festivals and events. I knew they would want to be part of the fun and enjoy meeting Ana. Guess who was the first to respond? Yes, my cousin Stephen. I was in shock and thrilled because lately Stephen was not usually at family gatherings. In fact, it had been at least a month since I saw or spoke to him. I was excited that he was coming! The second person to respond was my mom and then my sister.
At the same time, we received news that our great aunt in Colombia suddenly passed. I thought, “Well, maybe this was the sadness I was experiencing yesterday and today.” All day I felt such sadness, and it did not make sense. Of course, I was sad about her death, but I had not seen her in more than 15 years.
What was so intriguing in retrospect is that I later found out that my uncle, Stephen’s father, never received the text invitation, so he never came. His number still shows up in that text on my phone and other family members’ phones, but it never arrived on his cell.
I felt worse that Saturday afternoon, so bad, in fact, that I almost canceled the family gathering not once, but twice that day. Then I did transcendental meditation, and it helped to relieve the symptoms; my headache and intense sadness vanished. My friend, Ana, canceled an hour before dinner because she was (I will quote her) “feeling blue and just wanted to stay home.” Yes, there was an overwhelming sadness being experienced by so many of us, yet none of us were consciously aware of what was to come.
Stephen was the first to arrive at the restaurant. Looking back, I realize we were chosen for whatever reason to share Stephen’s last meal with him. Unbelievable! The restaurant was packed, so my mom, Stephen, and I waited outside in line. My husband David would join us later, while my sister and her family wanted to come just for the parade. I now realize how sacred that time together was.
I remember walking up to Stephen and thinking of how sharp he looked. Always well-dressed and groomed, so handsome; he definitely melted many hearts. Then the synchronicity and miracles started to unfold. There was no time to lose! Stephen was on a time clock. First, he had a present for me. I was surprised because my birthday is in May and Christmas was two months away. At the moment, there were no particular reasons for a gift; however, after the accident I understood this was a special gift Stephen left for all of us. It became a catalyst in our lives.
As I opened the bag he said, ”Kathy, this is the store you told me about, EarthTrading, at the mall. I went the other day and got something for you! It was a cool place.” I gasped. Inside was a pair of beautiful owl earrings! I realized Stephen was not aware of the “I-miss-you-grandma-pity-party I had with myself three days before.” I was an emotional mess because I missed my grandmother so much. I was not happy that she was gone. I wanted to share so much with her and yet she was not there, or so I thought. I even asked her for a sign to show me that she was still with me. On top of that, two weeks prior to Stephen giving me the earrings, I asked my mom to keep an eye out for owl earrings.
Owls are significant because one appeared outside the Hospice window when my grandmother was transitioning three and a half years ago. Since that time, our family has always associated the owl with grandma. By this time, my mom’s mouth was on the floor. She knew about my hunt for owl earrings, but the conversation was private. Stephen had no idea. I cried and kept hugging Stephen as I shared with him the conversations I had with grandma before she passed and my mom about the earrings. He shook his head, as he always did. I told him that it was awesome intuition; he was listening to his inner guidance, and I was so grateful and proud of him!
The next couple of minutes of the conversation got even more intriguing. I put on my beautiful pair of owl earrings and he said to me, “You know, Kathy, I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.” I was confused…What did I do? He laughed and said, “You know, like all the things you did for me when I was little, and no matter what happened you always believed in me.”
Looking back at his recollection of our lives growing up together, it was surreal. I just stared back at his big, brown eyes and said, “Of course, sweetheart! You’re my cousin, and I love you! I will always believe in you!” I remember that I was not sure what to think at that point, but no alarms were going off either. He continued to say how proud he was of my Living Vibrantly work. “I am proud of you, Kathy. You are finally doing what you are supposed to do!” I was dumbfounded! “I see all the stuff you do on Facebook and on your show. And by the way…I am doing the warm water with lemon.”
I had no clue my show was impacting his life, yet it was Stephen who would later impact me and my family and so many others. Stephen’s words would become the catalyst for me to re-launch Living Vibrantly after months of grieving.
Then Stephen thanked my mom for all that she did for him when he was little, and she was overwhelmed with joy and love. It was so beautiful and such a gift from Stephen—his precious time and his healing and loving words. Plus, those very special owl earrings.
David joined us late for dinner, and it was delightful. The conversation was perfect. Stephen shared what was going on in his life. Afterward, my sister and her family joined us for the parade. We were laughing, remembering silly times, and just watching people. Once the parade was over, my mom suggested we should take a family picture. The guys were not interested, but today I am so happy I insisted. This was the last picture with Stephen, and he was so happy!
At 10:30 p.m., we all kissed and hugged each other goodnight. Nobody knew that would be the last time we would see Stephen alive, but today we all know we will see him again.
How does one return to Live Vibrantly after something so tragic? I was immobile, felt paralyzed and vacant. For over a month, I put all my Living Vibrantly projects on hold, truly not knowing what I would do and asking for guidance. One day, while I was meditating and praying, Stephen’s words rang loud and clear: “I am proud of you, Kathy. You are finally doing what you are supposed to do!”
I cried and cried when I realized that Stephen lived the essence of Living Vibrantly, too! He touched many lives through his vibrant, giving and loving spirit, his contagious smile and his unending energy. He gave our family the ultimate gifts of compassion, kindness, and love.
Just two weeks before his death, Stephen asked his parents if his friend, David, could live with them. David had gone to high school with Stephen. He had a tough childhood, had eventually landed in jail and then was released on probation. David was now homeless with no family support. My uncle and aunt followed their hearts and agreed to have David live with them until he could get on his feet. It was another blessing because my uncle was not alone that night the police came with the tragic news; David was there, just as God had orchestrated it. God guided Stephen to complete His perfect plan of love, forgiveness, peace, compassion, and kindness until the very end. Amazing…..
Assistance from “The Other Side”
This revelation became the platform of “Rediscovering Living Vibrantly.” Each day, mediation and prayer became instrumental in helping me redevelop and continue with the mission. I know Stephen’s spirit is with me. There have been times when I am working and suddenly something reminds me of Stephen. I feel sadness and almost instantly something always makes me smile or laugh. I am reinvigorated with joy.
Stephen and I are on a mission and he is helping me from the other side.
Also, I am constantly reminded of all the miracles God presented to us through Stephen before his sudden death. I am reminded daily that the Divine is working closely with us all, and it now serves as my inspiration and the fuel that keeps me going. My mission is more alive than ever, and as a family we created a fund to help support the orphanage where Stephen was born 28years ago, La Casa de La Madre y El Nino.
I leave you with this poem written by my uncle, Augie Segura, Stephen’s father:
Waiting for You!
Son
I am here looking at the sky and thinking
About my beautiful son.
I am here in front of a pond in a very quiet place,
Where there is a lot of peace
Waiting for You!
I am here surrounded by trees and nature
By all the beauty God created.
Nature, that you loved so much,
Away from any distractions and
Waiting for You!
My heart is calm and there is so much peace in me,
Nothing compared to your peace,
The peace that only God can provide.
I am here feeling that peace now
Waiting for You!
The sky is grayer than blue but the blue
Is so strong and beautiful just like you
And I am here alone
Waiting for You!
I am here and it is very cold, the air is so fresh
And I am thinking about you my beautiful son
Remembering all our wonderful times together and
Waiting for You!
You know how much I adore you
You know how much I miss you
You know that I am here all alone and
Waiting for You!
Come beautiful son, come as an Angel
Please come and take me away with you
So that I do not have to sit here alone
Waiting for you!
Kathy “Katica” Rivera Wallace lives her own brand, Living Vibrantly. Katica earned her degree in business and marketing. After years of the corporate grind, Katica worked with her husband to grow their family business, as she continued volunteering in her community. Her naturally giving spirit was reinvigorated through these experiences, leading her on a path of self-improvement with an emphasis on gaining knowledge and certifications that would allow her to help others Live Vibrantly. She achieved certifications in Hypnotherapy, Qi Gong, Food Healing and Ancestral Clearing. Kathy also studied and practices Transcendental Meditation (Maharishi Mahesh Yogi). She achieved certifications in Hypnotherapy, Qi Gong and Food Healing. Through her award-winning webcast, Katica: Living Vibrantly, that seeks to help her audience live a vibrant life by aligning body, mind and spirit. Visit www.katicatv.com.
