by Dr. Mark Pitstick
Outstanding relationships of all types—family, friends, and significant other—are key parts of radiant living. As famed psychiatrist Karl Menninger, M.D., said, “Love cures people. Both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.” Healthy relationships help us grow toward balance, joy, and enlightenment.
A relationship with another person is a sacred privilege to be appreciated. Like a garden, relationships need to be cultivated; those who nourish fledgling friendships gain flowering results.
A real sense of freedom and openness to growth occurs when another person deeply loves and accepts you. Loving relationships are a transformational practice in which both people see the highest potential in each other.
On this theme, Rev. Eric Butterworth writes in Life Is for Loving:
“Love is not to be found. It consists not in finding the right person, but in becoming the right person . . . True marriage comes about as two people sense and see in each other something of the divine potential that is always present beyond appearances. This leads to a mutual commitment to help each other mate with one’s God-self.”
You may dimly remember how wonderful relationships are in spiritual dimensions and yearn for a “soul mate” level of relationship, a deeply connected and joyful intimacy. During a spiritual regression—a visit to celestial realms during deep hypnosis—one woman explained what it looked like when two nonphysical beings make love. She described it as a swirling and whirling of intermingled colors and energy.
That’s one reason why sex without love is only a fraction of what can be. The sexual revolution of the 70’s was fun at times, but had several serious downsides. Sacred lovemaking is a powerful path to transforming every part of you and a wonderful way to feel alive and blissful.
As you go through stages in a healthy relationship, focus on the good in each other instead of amplifying the less desirable points. Most relationships periodically encounter tough times. Strong winds that bend, but don’t break a tree make it stronger and more flexible. Similarly, weathering temporary storms in relationships can make them deeper and richer.
I’m not, however, recommending an unending commitment to any form of relationship if it doesn’t serve you. Some people barely tolerate each other in a marriage that was a mistake in the beginning. I’ve counseled numerous people whose lives were in shambles after decades of an abusive and unloving union.
One elderly woman who was contemplating suicide confessed: “I haven’t loved my husband for 40 years, but we stayed together because that’s what we were taught.” This “we’ll make it work if it kills us” attitude aptly describes the stress-related illnesses that predominate in long-term negative relationships.
If your relationship lacks harmony, do everything you can to save it. The costs of broken marriages, especially when children are involved, are devastating. Obtain marital counseling and attend marriage enrichment training.
But if a bond is truly unhappy after years of trying, let it go and move on.
Life is too short to live in an unfulfilling relationship. Continuing a facade of a relationship for the sake of following social or religious convention is not worth it. Needless to say, no one should remain in an abusive relationship; physically abused women may not get a second chance to escape. Mental abuse is just as bad due to the invisible emotional wounds that result.
When a relationship does end—by death or separation—remember that your heart can only be broken if it’s closed and hardened. Some people remain in a long, self-imposed isolation and experience severe grief. The process can be lighter and briefer than that. Go through a period of mourning, yes, but keep your heart open. Then, when you’re ready, find another partner. There’s more than one fish in the sea and more than one soul mate for each of us. Trust life’s changes and keep living.
Some believe in a twin-flame relationship in which you meet a person who is the other half of your soul, but there is little evidence of this. Michael Newton, Ph.D., author of Journey of Souls and founder of spiritual regressions, says that he has seen no proof of such a limiting arrangement. Think about it . . . if there is only one true love for you, what if you never meet that person? Or what if he or she dies at an early age or is otherwise unavailable? It doesn’t sound like a very good setup and I think Universe is wiser and more flexible than that.
Reports from “the other side” say that we each have dozens of primary soul mates and a greater number of secondary ones.
These entities can play the role of loved ones during your temporary earth-experience. So you’re not limited to just one “true love” if a romantic relationship ends.
If a relationship “ends” because of death, the good news is that it really doesn’t have to end. You can continue an inter-dimensional relationship with that person. Many patients over the years have sheepishly admitted to carrying on a conversation with departed loved ones. There’s no need to be embarrassed about this.
You can telepathically talk with departed loved ones, feel their presence, and—in the inner quiet of your heart—hear their gentle replies. Your loved ones are not a zillion trillion miles away somewhere; they likely are in the same space as you, but their non-physical nature is operating with a higher, finer energy that you may not be able to detect. One key to feeling their presence is to meditate, be relaxed and upbeat so you on are a similar wavelength as they.
You deserve to experience high levels of love in your primary relationship and with all your family and friends. Don’t settle for anything else.
Mark Pitstick, MA, DC is an author, frequent media guest, chiropractic physician, clinical psychologist, radio show host, and workshop leader who helps you know and show your magnificence in body, mind, and spirit. Visit his website at www.soulproof.com for FREE radio shows, e-mail newsletters, articles, and special reports. To see his workshop schedule, visit: www.soulproof.com/workshops.html. To schedule a Soul Proof Experience workshop in your area, contact him at mark@soulproof.com or call 740-775-2189.
