by Berenice Andrews
If you’re a soul searcher—someone on a journey of spiritual evolution—(and I suspect that you are!), I offer you this “dialog” to help you get closer to finding your True Self. We start with a “Socratic” query:
If you’re seeking to find your “True Self,” do you have a false one?
Yes…it’s my ego.
And why is it a false self?
Because it denies my spirituality!
So, how would you describe your “ego?”
Well, it seems to be “me” It’s always all about me...and for someone on a spiritual path, that’s unacceptable!
Then, as a soul searcher, what do you “know” about who you are?
Thus far, I know that I am the incarnated “image and likeness” of the Spirit; the Consciousness Energy that created (and continues to create) the entire Cosmos, including me…out of Itself.
Then how would you describe you as that “image and likeness?”
As that image and likeness, I am a microcosmic manifestation of the Spirit—a soul, an energy being—whose holistic centers of consciousness (chakras) are the Spirit’s creative power expressing in me.
Then, because you are a creative manifestation of the Spirit, would you agree that your chakras could each carry the aspects of the Spirit, in microcosm?
They would have to, wouldn’t they?
Yes. Then, would you also agree that one of the aspects of the Spirit is beingness?
Yes, of course!
Good…In the ancient scriptures of Judaism, the Spirit describes Itself as “I-AM.” (Exodus 3:14)
And that “I-AM” would pre-suppose both consciousness and beingness, wouldn’t it?
Yes, it would…Now, would you agree that each one of your chakras could carry a microcosmic “i-am”/consciousness/beingness?
They would have to…wouldn’t they?
Yes, they would…And since the scriptural word for “I am” has been rendered for about 2,000 years as “ego,” would you accept that word?
Yes…it’s now part of my language…isn’t it?
Then, would you also agree that because you are an energy being and a soul searcher focusing on spiritual evolution, your “ego” could be involved closely in the journey?
Good lord!…Yes! But how?
How? Since your chakras are the Spirit’s creative power—in microcosm—they have generated your physical, emotional, mental, and transcendent “bodies.” (Form follows consciousness!) And, as an energy being—a soul—your “forms” have consisted of soul structures that included your microcosmic “i-am”/consciousness/beingness—known as your egoic structures. Thus, as self-identification, those structures have been a fundamental part of you. So, they’re much more than a “false self” that prevents you from “being” who you truly “are.”
But how? Why?
From the moment you were conceived, your chakras—guided by your nucleus of divinity—ceaselessly generated your egoic structures. Predominant were those of the root center (“I sense, therefore I am”), of the sacral center (“I feel, therefore I am”) and of the solar plexus center (“I think, therefore I am”).
After your birth, the creative “work” continued. Your bodies, consisting of your soul structures—including your egoic structures—developed. Predominant were your root chakra’s structures of physicality, especially your “anatomy” of beliefs. These structures interacted with your sacral chakra’s structures of emotionality—the intense feelings (value responses) that were triggered by your beliefs. In turn, those powerful physical and emotional energies drove your solar plexus chakra’s structures of mentality—your often convoluted and confused “thoughts.” And, there, in the midst of all this were those egoic structures—your developing “self.”
I’m listening!
Thus, you began this lifetime as an energy being whose soul structures were predominantly needs-oriented and pre-human. Awaiting you were your immense possibilities…and many obstacles to be overcome.
And why was that?
As a manifestation of the Spirit—a soul, an energy being—you came here with a Life Plan that included your spiritual journey of evolving out of animal soul consciousness. The obstacles arose because your chakras could be damaged, even during fetal development.
Hmmm! Why? How?
In this world, the energies of “lovelessness” abound. They can wound the soul substance (the soul field) out of which you are made and they can damage your chakras. Then, those centers of consciousness are unable to generate healthy “bodies,” including the egoic structures that are inextricably part of them.
Wow! How are an animal soul’s egoic structures damaged by lovelessness?
In a loveless inner and/or outer environment, the archetypal imperatives of the animal soul’s chakras—the physicality, emotionality and mentality—can be compromised. Thus, the soul structures are likely to be needs/appetites-oriented and fear-based, while being constantly alert to anything that they “think” is threatening (pain) and/or gratifying (pleasure). Hence, an animal soul’s “self” can basically express only that intractable dichotomy.
So, what you’re telling me is that, although I am the incarnated image and likeness of the Spirit, I chose to be born into this loveless world as an energy being (an animal soul) whose chakras (microcosmic creative energies) sustained damage likely before but certainly after my birth with the result that the soul structures they generated, including my egoic structures, were unhealthy. …Ah! but somewhere along the line I “knew” this and got started on the spiritual journey included in my Life Plan. And there I was thinking that I was really “unacceptable!”
Yes, there you were. But, can an animal soul’s ego be blamed for its unfailing reactions, if that’s all it “knows”? Can you assume that what you “are” is an unacceptable part of creation, if that’s all you have generated?
Well…no.
Yet, that’s exactly what most people assume until they pause (usually in the midst of a crisis) to listen to the inner Spirit calling them to evolve spiritually. Deep within they “know” that they are more than what they believe they are!
Well, that’s what got me going! And I kept hoping to find my True Self while I was busy rejecting “me!”
So, your journey began, with an animal soul’s egoic structures as your rather shaky starting-point. And, from the onset, you have undertaken the consciousness-raising “tasks” of purifying, simplifying, and unifying, which are necessary for healing your damaged chakras and, thereby, transmuting the unhealthy energies of your soul structures…including your egoic structures. And you have done well!
That’s encouraging! It has sometimes been very difficult.
Oh, yes! In this Spirit-guided journey, when healing is underway, there are difficult moments. But, there’s help for you in surmounting your obstacles. It’s there now when you pay attention.
I’ll take whatever help is offered! What is it?
It’s an energy called the “Observer” and it’s there when you “summon” it. It’s your ultimate ally and friend, one who never advises, comments, or criticizes. It simply observes, while you are discerning whatever you are experiencing—outwardly and inwardly.
How can the Observer help me?
With the Observer accompanying you on the journey, you can develop an increasing capacity for observing/discerning. Slowly the power of the needs/appetites, fears, and thoughts of animal soul diminish and you start to sense a different “you” in you.
How does that happen?
While you have undertaken your “tasks,” you have been receiving input from your “higher” centers of consciousness. They were there all along, but not recognized (or recognized only dimly), by your animal soul. With the Observer’s help, you will increasingly be able to discern and utilize that input. It’s the energy of transcendence—physical, emotional, and mental—informed by Life, Light, Love, and Law. That energy flows across the “bridge” and foments in the “crucible” of your heart center of consciousness.
Ah, yes! My heart awareness!
Yes! In your heart awareness, animal soul structures, especially your “anatomy” of beliefs, are slowly transmuted. (It’s like the caterpillar’s metamorphosis into the butterfly.)
Yes, it would be!
In this process, the either/or dichotomy expressed by your animal soul’s egoic structures (its “self”) is changed into the both/and paradox of a truly human “i-am”/consciousness/beingness.
Continue!
And within that paradox there is a deepening sense of empowerment that’s overwhelmingly one of discernment, detachment, and clarity. Thus, without any planning, you start experiencing the consciousness energies described as the hallmarks of wisdom.
So, does finding wisdom actually involve finding my True Self?
Yes, it does. With that inner empowerment, now flavored by an intense gratitude, you continue your journey. Then, one fine day (it just seems to happen that way), you notice that the Observer has vanished. You pause…and discern. Then, you realize that you have “found” your True Self.
I’ll be finding a lot more than I thought!
But have you really “found” anything? At that moment in your heart awareness, you’ll know that what you’ve been looking for is what you’ve been looking with, and that you are one with your nucleus of divinity. So, your “i-am”/ego and the “I-AM”/Ego have finished the journey you started together.
What a trip!
Yes…It’s one of immense creativity. But isn’t that why you came here in the first place?
Yes! And this soul searcher is moving onward and upward…until we meet again?
Until then…Peace and blessings.
Berenice Andrews is a shamanic teacher/healer. For her teachings about evolutionary spirituality, see back issues of this magazine and consult her book Rebirthing Into Androgyny: Your Quest for Wholeness, And Afterward. To enroll as her student, click on her website thestonecircleclassroom.com.