How to Drop the Baggage

By Arielle Giordano

Ten steps to follow on your own journey toward peace and happiness.

I recently realized how powerful past experiences can influence our present lives. It happened when I was working with a coach to address a betrayal in my life, and I connected it back to my divorce. During the process of separation, my best female friend told me that she had a lunch date with my husband. I was so shocked that all I could do was react with anger. That was the end of our friendship; we never spoke again.

While the new situation did not involve a close friend, the awareness of betrayal from the past incident moved forward anyway, and it allowed me to see how experiences hold and carry energy. By understanding that we are clinging to past experiences, we can take the first step in figuring out how to release them and more forward without “the baggage.”

In this case, I asked myself, “Did I repress this event to avoid pain?” and “Was this event brought into light from my unconscious mind to my conscious mind?” My answer is yes on both questions. The movement and awareness from the unconscious into the conscious mind can be a powerful method to release energy and tension, and observing this helped to set me free from the initial betrayal experience.

Did this come up into my conscious awareness to be released and healed? Again, my answer is indeed a resounding “yes” and, as a result, I am now free to move forward without this burden and interference.

If you, too, are ready to engage in releasing past experiences, those that are holding you back and keeping you stuck, here are 10 steps to follow on your own journey toward peace and happiness:

  1. Think of the things that keep coming up in your life: issues, dilemmas, and/or problems.
  2. Pick one issue/dilemma/problem as your focus.
  3. Relax, take deep breaths, listen to music, dance, and give yourself permission to think of the first time this issue/dilemma/problem occurred in your life.
  4. Explore the details: age, place, people, and circumstances. Identify the “who, what, when, where, and how” of the issue/dilemma/problem.
  5. Allow yourself to know and see all that is coming up for you.
  6. Journal and write with your favorite pen and paper.
  • Write down your issue, and include all the details and circumstances.
  • Answer the question, “What am I attracting into my life?”
  • Explore through your writing and be honest with yourself. Let yourself flow with whatever comes to you. There is nothing to fear; the truth will set you free!
  • Find clarity: Find the real issue that you are dealing with and how you are participating in or contributing to the situation.
  • Let the answer come to you in the “flow.” You do not have to go looking for it.
  •  Be open and soft in the receiving and surrender to the answer.
  • As you begin to know and flow, you grow!

Transformational Life Coach Award-Winning Author & Speaker, Professional Dancer. Arielle’s Award-Winning book for Best Self-Help Award: Dancing With Your Story From The Inside is available on Her professional career includes the Lead Faculty Area Chairperson and Professor for the College of Humanities, History and the Arts at the University of Phoenix. She is a published co-author of Transform Your Life Books 1 & 2 and author for Tampa Bay Wellness, Conscious Shift & Transformation magazine. She has published her 4th book, an Instructor’s Manual for Barlow Abnormal Psychology 4th ed. and authored Psychology, A Journey 3rd.ed. Study Guide published by Nelson Education, Toronto, ON. She has also studied philosophy at the College of Integrated Philosophy with John DeRuiter for twenty years. Arielle has been a featured guest on radio and television, in newspapers, and the media across the US and Canada. She is a certified Essentrics Stretch and Dance Instructor. Arielle offers coaching sessions, classes and workshops and a free 30-minute Consultation. Websites:, Email:

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